# Stuff and Things > Sights and Sounds >  Today's Toons 1/18 -current, by Pookie

## pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & L: 
 

In Case You Missed It Dept.: 

2017 Adults Acting Stupid Awards

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## Rickity Plumber

Exceptionally good today pookie

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## pookie18

> Exceptionally good today pookie


Glad you liked 'em, Rickity Plumber!

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## Rickity Plumber

> Glad you liked 'em, Rickity Plumber!


Why is this not used as standard anti-snowflake/leftist material? I know  you are the messenger @pookie18 , but this speaks soo loud but yet I  have never heard this used against statue hating thugs.

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## pookie18

> Why is this not used as standard anti-snowflake/leftist material? I know  you are the messenger @pookie18 , but this speaks soo loud but yet I  have never heard this used against statue hating thugs.


Good point, Rickity Plumber! I don't believe in the former & probably not in the latter, but definitely a rhetorical eye for an eye...

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Rickity Plumber (01-03-2018)

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## pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter C: 
 


In Case You Missed It Dept.: 

Men's Health stated this is the year's biggest week for diet programs and gym memberships. It was easy for me to shape up. Back in 2016 I was the only performer in Hollywood who predicted Trump would get elected, and this year so many dinner invitations disappeared that I lost ten pounds.  

A Russian billionaire died in Moscow while jogging Thursday after taking a Viagra. So much for wowing all the maids at the bus stop as you jog by. His name hasn't been released, yet already Los Angeles lawyer Gloria Allred is eulogizing him as the sexual misconduct settlement that got away.  

The Hollywood Reporter reported all male nominees attending the Golden Globe Awards will wear black in sympathy with the female nominees wearing black to protest sexual misconduct in Hollywood. They're not kidding around. I said hello to an actress yesterday, and my trial starts Friday.  

President Trump was accused by Democrats of walking into the Miss Universe dressing room when he owned the pageant. It's tricky. If he had walked in wearing an evening gown and a little eyeliner and said he wanted to use the bathroom, the Democrats would have given him a medal.  

 -- Argus Hamilton

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## Dr. Felix Birdbiter

A breath of fresh air after a dismal week end.  Thank you Mr. Pookie

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## pookie18

> A breath of fresh air after a dismal week end.  Thank you Mr. Pookie


You're welcome, Dr. Felix Birdbiter!

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## Deno

Thanks Pookie, I always look forward to these...

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## pookie18

> Thanks Pookie, I always look forward to these...


Glad you enjoy them, Deno!

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## pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & L: 
 

In Case You Missed It Dept.: 

Elizabeth Warren: I Believe In Science!

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Beachcomber (01-12-2018),Dr. Felix Birdbiter (01-12-2018),Hillofbeans (01-12-2018),Mainecoons (01-12-2018),ruthless terrier (01-12-2018)

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## Dr. Felix Birdbiter

dis so funnie

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## Rickity Plumber

Hillary-ous!


Hey, I may have just coined a new word! 

Yep, I am taking full responsibility for this! Yay!


Thanks for the light bulb going off in my head @pookie18 .

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## pookie18

> dis so funnie


Glad you liked 'em, Dr. Felix Birdbiter!

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## pookie18

> Hillary-ous!
> 
> 
> Hey, I may have just coined a new word! 
> 
> Yep, I am taking full responsibility for this! Yay!
> 
> 
> Thanks for the light bulb going off in my head @pookie18 .


You're welcome, @Rickity Plumber! It better have been an incandescent one...

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## Rickity Plumber

> You're welcome, @Rickity Plumber! It better have been an incandescent one...


That is why YOU are the Pook-Meister!


"Incandescent" . . . isn't that a little un-politically correct @pookie18 ? I mean in this day and age with global warming, I mean cooling . . .

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## pookie18

> That is why YOU are the Pook-Meister!
> 
> 
> "Incandescent" . . . isn't that a little un-politically correct @pookie18 ? I mean in this day and age with global warming, I mean cooling . . .


Well, some years ago, someone made this for me:


vxLGiVv.jpg

Yes @Rickity Plumber, when my incandescent bulb has been on awhile & I touch it, I experience handal warming usually followed by rapid cooling...

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Rickity Plumber (01-12-2018)

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## ruthless terrier

:Smiley ROFLMAO:

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## pookie18

> 


I was wondering if De Zero came from a sh*thole family...

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## keymanjim

ed96ae259c3b4155f80f78bcf86b334552d412edc7361f4288069ea8a5de9e3d.jpg

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## pookie18

> Attachment 27188


Thanks, keymanjim...will rerun in Monday's thread...

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keymanjim (01-12-2018)

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## pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & L: 
 

In Case You Missed It Dept.: 

The Hollywood Reporter said Thursday Harvey Weinstein and his wife Georgianna Chapman have reached a final agreement on their divorce settlement. Alfred Hitchcock couldn't make this story up. The one woman who said yes to Harvey Weinstein winds up with half of everything he owns.  

Congress returned to work last week in Washington D.C. with a full slate of issues to legislate over which there is bitter partisan dispute. There's no longer any middle ground. The latest poll shows that one hundred percent of Americans think fifty percent of Americans have lost their minds.  

The Motion Picture Academy announced Friday that seventy-two hundred Academy members will vote for Best Picture. The Oscars telecast will air in six weeks. Everyone in Hollywood will be wearing black at the Oscars following Saturday's news that President Trump is in excellent health.  

President Trump went to Walter Reed Hospital to undergo the traditional presidential physical Friday where doctors went over him and through him all day. They did a lot of digging. After two hours, Trump's proctologist emerged from Central America and stated that everything looks just fine.  

The Minnesota Vikings had the entire nation talking Monday after their last-second sixty-yard TD pass put them into the NFC Championship in Philadelphia. You can't make it up. President Trump called for more immigrants from Norway and this week the Vikings arrive on the East Coast.  

Democratic Senator Dick Durbin of Illinois told reports Friday that Trump did indeed call Third World nations such as El Salvador, Haiti and African nations S-holes, but the president denied it. Both men are sticking to their guns. Durbin swears Trump said S-hole, Trump insists he said Chicago.  

Hawaii's false missile alert and public panic quickly turned into a partisan catfight Monday. It always does. The Democrats said it proves Trump needs to placate North Korea, while Republicans said if you think Hawaii's emergency alert system is bad, you should see their birth certificate system.  

CNN came under fire Monday for not covering the Hawaii missile attack false alert live and the public panic it was causing. Instead they ran a re-run of an interview with a Trump-bashing author. Trump could discover the cure for cancer and CNN would say he doesn't care about AIDS.  

Donald Trump was ripped by the media for playing golf on MLK Day Monday. All week long if they weren't calling Trump a racist they were calling him a Nazi. It didn't help Tuesday when the White House physician told reporters that Trump's excellent health was due to his superior genes.  

Japanese news issued a false alarm of a missile attack from North Korea Tuesday. Hawaii set off an alarm thinking they were being attacked by North Korean missiles last Saturday. President Trump opened the envelope Wednesday and the winner of the Fake News Awards was Kim Jung Un.  

President Trump released his Fake News Awards to the New York Times, CNN, ABC News, Time and the Washington Post for false stories about him last year for which they had to retract or apologize. The antagonism is real. If Donald Trump walked on water, CNN would say he can't swim.  

The Detroit Free Press reported a steep drop in Obamacare enrollments in Michigan since the mandate was removed by the tax cuts. They're still having a few technical problems. Last week the Obamacare website routed me to iTunes, and now Hookers and Blow are my primary care providers.  

 -- Argus Hamilton 

North Korea has announced that it will send a group of citizens called the "cheering squad" to next month's Winter Olympics. And many of them are expected to actually compete in a new event called the "400 Meter Defection."  

 -- Conan

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## Dr. Felix Birdbiter

As always Pook Man, excellent way to start the day.

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## pookie18

> As always Pook Man, excellent way to start the day.


Glad you like 'em, Dr. Felix Birdbiter!

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## Dr. Felix Birdbiter

> Glad you like 'em, Dr. Felix Birdbiter!



I prescribe them to all my patients

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## pookie18

> I prescribe them to all my patients


@Dr. Felix Birdbiter
So I see...

pookiepings.gif
medical-prescription-drugs.jpg

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## Deno

Thanks Pookie....

I love em...

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## pookie18

> Thanks Pookie....
> 
> I love em...


My pleasure & glad you do, Deno!

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## pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & L: 
 

In Case You Missed It Dept.: 

Harvey Weinstein was sued by the state of New York for sexually harassing women over whom he had power in Hollywood. His case triggered other cases that ruined politicians, TV anchors and actors. It's beginning to look like 2018 may be the toughest year in history to sleep your way to the top.  

The Academy Awards show will be televised live from the Nokia Theater in Hollywood Sunday night on ABC. The ratings are always huge. The Academy Awards allows the American people to enjoy seeing the most number of stars in one place without having to donate to the Democratic Party.  

President Trump scolded Jeff Sessions on Wednesday for delaying an FBI probe of Hillary with an Inspector General review, and top advisor Hope Hicks quit a day after testifying to Congress. The press went wild. They cover the Trump White House like every day's a new episode of Keeping Up with the White-Trashians.  

The Academy Awards aired Sunday on ABC from the Nokia Theater in Hollywood hosted by Jimmy Kimmel. The list of nominees paid tribute to nostalgia. The ice skating movie about Tonya Harding was reminder of an earlier America back whenever an athlete took a knee, they took a knee.  

Dick's Sporting Goods store announced Thursday it will no longer sell assault rifles in its six hundred and ten stores in forty-seven states in response to the Florida high school shootings. The announcement ignited euphoria in Hollywood. Ellen DeGeneres just announced she loves Dick's.  

The Oscars applauded the Me, Too movement and then gave Best Screenplay to a pedophilia movie, Best Actor to an accused wife beater, and Best Animated Short to an NBA star once charged with rape. A half-hour into the show, Harvey Weinstein took home three Oscars without their consent.  

Kobe Bryant was given a standing ovation when he won the Oscar for Best Animated Short. It proved that a man has to actually be charged with rape before he can receive a standing ovation at the Oscars. If Roman Polanski doesn't realize it's safe to come home to Hollywood now, he never will.  

President Trump was a surprise hit at the Gridiron Dinner Saturday by poking fun of himself and his staff. No one ever heard him be so self-deprecating. President Trump got so many laughs making fun of himself at the Gridiron Dinner that Alec Baldwin accused Trump of doing his Trump.  

 -- Argus Hamilton

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