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Thread: Man Tells Police His Gun Was Stolen During a Masked Sex Party He Hosted

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    Man Tells Police His Gun Was Stolen During a Masked Sex Party He Hosted

    Man Tells Police His Gun Was Stolen During a Masked Sex Party He Hosted

    Rob Fox, August 12, 2019 4:37 pm
    NBC2NBC2

    Who hasn’t been there, right? You’ve got twenty naked strangers in your house wearing Venetian masks and getting gross with each other on your furniture. At some point beforehand you were so moist with anticipation that, whoopsie daisy, you left your 9mm Glock sitting out on your nightstand. Recently divorced Deena from the pool was coming that night! How could you possibly concentrate on anything else? Between that and making sure the glory holes were ready it feels pretty understandable that you could let something like leaving your gun out slip your mind.

    Plus if you can’t trust the two dozen people you invited over to have sex with each other, who can you trust?



    We don’t live in a perfect world, though, and one Florida man found out that just because you’re accommodating enough to have almost two football teams worth of people over for a screw party doesn’t mean they’re going to reward your hospitality. He had his 9mm Glock stolen off his nightstand by one of his guests. He reported the crime to police but told them he wasn’t able to give them the names of the guests because he didn’t know them. He also couldn’t describe what the guests looked like because they were all wearing masks.


    According to Sgt. Todd Smith with the Volusia County Sheriff’s Office the man claimed that pretty much everyone who came over to his house was a stranger. The sex party was advertised on social media and people were encouraged to bring friends. Just bring any hole or wang or what have you was the rule, apparently. And it turns out one of the people who showed up to the F fest was just as horny for a free gun as they were for the other guests. Way to ruin an orgy, you jerk gun thief.



    The saddest epitaph which can be carved in memory of a vanished liberty is that it was lost because its possessors failed to stretch forth a saving hand while yet there was time. — JUSTICE GEORGE SUTHERLAND (1938)

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    Where does a naked partygoer hide a Glock?

    I need to see a picture of this Deena in order to make up my mind about the validity of his story.

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    Sigh! Why is it always Florida?

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    Quote Originally Posted by dinosaur View Post


    Where does a naked partygoer hide a Glock?
    .
    From the type of party this was, IMO the thief’s prison wallet/holster would be bigger than the meth girls vagina wallet.

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.urb...sting&amp=true
    Last edited by Big Dummy; 08-12-2019 at 08:55 PM.
    The saddest epitaph which can be carved in memory of a vanished liberty is that it was lost because its possessors failed to stretch forth a saving hand while yet there was time. — JUSTICE GEORGE SUTHERLAND (1938)

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    Quote Originally Posted by dinosaur View Post


    Where does a naked partygoer hide a Glock?

    I need to see a picture of this Deena in order to make up my mind about the validity of his story.
    You missed the meth and stolen $6000 thread didn’t you

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    Quote Originally Posted by markdido View Post
    Sigh! Why is it always Florida?
    You ever follow Billy corbin’s Twitter? He always tags the stories he posts #becauseitsflorida

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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Dummy View Post
    From the type of party this was, IMO the thief’s prison wallet/holster would be bigger than the meth girls vagina wallet.

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.urb...sting&amp=true
    https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/wor...is-Bloomington

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    You can find quite a few of those stories.

    These are relevant at a gay mans party.

    10” pistol story. https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_1208666



    i never thought revolvers were pocket sized.
    Last edited by Big Dummy; 08-12-2019 at 10:03 PM.
    The saddest epitaph which can be carved in memory of a vanished liberty is that it was lost because its possessors failed to stretch forth a saving hand while yet there was time. — JUSTICE GEORGE SUTHERLAND (1938)

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    Whoa, this just in: Joe Biden proposes new gun storage requirements for home owners hosting orgies. Also says home owners are just as smart as white kids. Bill Clinton vows to investigate these parties further.

    More breaking news: Joe Biden finds out some of the participants were really put in chains and handcuffs. Tells voters his previous claim about putting people back in chains is correct and now verified !!
    Last edited by MedicineBow; 08-12-2019 at 10:17 PM.

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    I heard that he also inquired about some crystal meth he hid "somewhere" in another story.....
    Al Swearengen: What's your partner so mad about all the time?
    Sol Star: He's not mad.
    Al Swearengen: He's got a mean way of being happy.



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