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Thread: Toilet Paper

  1. #1
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    Toilet Paper

    "The UK uses 1.3m tonnes of tissue a year, according to the Confederation of Paper Industries, with the average British consumer reportedly getting through 127 rolls every year."
    https://www.theguardian.com/environm...searchers-warn

    And I go through perhaps four rolls a year. How is this possible? I was doing shopping for a neighbor who was laid up and every week her shopping lift had two rolls of toilet paper. I found that unbelievable but it's less than low compared to England.

    What's the difference in me and my neighbor? I don't wear makeup.

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    Quote Originally Posted by patrickt View Post
    "The UK uses 1.3m tonnes of tissue a year, according to the Confederation of Paper Industries, with the average British consumer reportedly getting through 127 rolls every year."
    https://www.theguardian.com/environm...searchers-warn

    And I go through perhaps four rolls a year. How is this possible? I was doing shopping for a neighbor who was laid up and every week her shopping lift had two rolls of toilet paper. I found that unbelievable but it's less than low compared to England.

    What's the difference in me and my neighbor? I don't wear makeup.
    You only use four rolls a year? Perhaps you may want to increase that number. Makes for good neighbors too.



    Kee-rist, my wife uses four rolls a week.



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    Quote Originally Posted by patrickt View Post
    "The UK uses 1.3m tonnes of tissue a year, according to the Confederation of Paper Industries, with the average British consumer reportedly getting through 127 rolls every year."
    https://www.theguardian.com/environm...searchers-warn

    And I go through perhaps four rolls a year. How is this possible? I was doing shopping for a neighbor who was laid up and every week her shopping lift had two rolls of toilet paper. I found that unbelievable but it's less than low compared to England.

    What's the difference in me and my neighbor? I don't wear makeup.
    You just as well go muslim style.
    Today we live. Tomorrow we die.
    "Evil is da Devil minus da D"

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    I hearken back to the days when we had a Sears-Roebuck catalog at hand for those inconveniences. Oh, how I miss those days of yesteryear.
    Last edited by S-N-A-F-U; 07-07-2019 at 06:57 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HawkTheSlayer View Post
    You just as well go muslim style.
    And hold up its head to kiss your goat with your right hand.


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    gosh now we have someone questioning how often a person wipes their behind. The Internet is a wonderful place.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Freewill View Post
    gosh now we have someone questioning how often a person wipes their behind. The Internet is a wonderful place.
    How does a blind man know when to quit wiping?
    You don't want to read Braille on that paper.
    Today we live. Tomorrow we die.
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    So many comments went through my mind.....
    I just better pass on this one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Freewill View Post
    gosh now we have someone questioning how often a person wipes their behind. The Internet is a wonderful place.
    Yeah, but that's nothing. When I worked at the prison I had a female supervisor call me at home and said she wanted to ask me about a disciplinary case she was writing an offender up for. So I said ok, shoot.

    Linda: Do you remember last week in J block when offender Jones was masturbating?
    Me: Yeah I remember.
    Linda: Was his penis circumcised or not?
    Me: I don't know.
    Linda: Ok, did you see him ejaculate?
    Me: No I did not.
    Linda: Ok then, but you see see his penis right?
    Me: Yeah I caught a glimpse of it.
    Linda: How would you describe it?
    Me: Smaller than mine!
    Linda: LHAO!

    Really now, that is a fucked up convo, and for prison, perfectly normal.

    Later:
    My wife: Who called?
    Me: Linda.
    My wife: What did she want?
    Me: Talk about a convict jacking off.
    My wife: Oh.

    Linda was a lesbian so I could make dick jokes with her.
    Last edited by Captain Kirk!; 07-07-2019 at 10:00 AM.
    I have a marvelous economy with words.

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    Boston College uses a lot of toilet paper, it's what they print the diplomas on. You think I'm joking? Ask AOC to show your hers.
    Regarding my avatar: I am the one on your left as you view it

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